Halloween Warning

Sorry to get this out to everyone so late, but better late than never. I have to warn you about the dangers of Halloween and Halloween candy. I recently read an article by Kimberly Daniels titled “The Danger of Celebrating Halloween”, and needed to share it with everyone. She writes:

The word “holiday” means “holy day.” But there is nothing holy about Halloween. The root word of Halloween is “hallow,” which means “holy, consecrated and set apart for service.” If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer’s!

Note: Beware of other holidays – such as the Fourth of July (set aside for the worship of the United States) and Labor Day (set aside for worshiping the worker).

During Halloween, time-released curses are always loosed.

Wow, the devil sure is getting high-tech. I thought only pharmaceutical drugs could be time-released. Move over Eli-Lilly.

You may ask, “Doesn’t God have more power than the devil?” Yes, but He has given that power to us.

God’s infinite power has been given to us! Speaking of which, I meant to blame you for not healing grandma. Dick.

During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.

Yeah, I could totally see Hershey Foods and Mars Co. doing that. I mean, hiring witches to pray over food in a when a majority of Americans and a majority of workers are Christians. I mean, that wouldn’t be a public relations nightmare. Nor would any of the thousands of workers ever find out. And Hershey’s has so much to gain from it.

I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.

Demons: they promote tooth decay, too!

While the lukewarm and ignorant think of these customs as “just harmless fun,” the vortexes of hell are releasing new assignments against souls. Witches take pride in laughing at the ignorance of natural men (those who ignore the spirit realm).

Decorating buildings with Halloween scenes, dressing up for parties, going door-to-door for candy, standing around bonfires and highlighting pumpkin patches are all acts rooted in entertaining familiar spirits. All these activities are demonic and have occult roots.

Yup. Pagan roots. I wonder if she knows the origins of Christmas Trees and Easter Bunnies. I guess All-Saints Day and Reformation Day just weren’t quite popular enough to overshadow the pagan origins of Halloween. I mean Reformation Day – what could be more fun than remembering the Reformation?

The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes.

Wait, now danger is not in the scary things we see — like “dressing up for parties, going door-to-door for candy, standing around bonfires and highlighting pumpkin patches”? What about “demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities” and “vortexes of hell”?

These activities include:
* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
* Revel nights
* Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
* Release of “time-released” curses against the innocent and the ignorant.

Yeash. I’m an atheist, and I don’t even get invited to those parties. Then again, maybe it’s because I don’t have any spare babies to sacrifice. You know us atheists, always short on babies because we kill ’em all-year-round.

If you or your family members have opened the door to any curses that are released during the demonic fall festivals, renounce them and repent. I already have.

Sorry, neighborhood kids: no candy for you. Worship the devil at someone else’s house.

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Conspiracy Theories

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Conspiracy Theories

Out at the coffeeshop last night, I happened to be sitting next to a man (40ish and Muslim) and a woman (30ish and Muslim) talking about conspiracies. The man was enthusiastically pointing out details on the dollar bill – talking about the secret symbolism on the dollar, saying how American presidents were all in some secret (Masonic?) group, and that the bloodlines of world leaders were just continuations of ancient monarchy bloodlines. I don’t know how people get all mixed up in believing these kinds of conspiracy theories, but I had heard once that conspiracy theories were appealed to a person’s sense of control – that even if they can’t control the world, they understood the forces “truely” at work beneath the surface. It also “explains” why some people are successful, while they aren’t.

At first, I thought the woman was just humoring him, but she started agreeing with him. He was talking about how he had read about all of this stuff in a book – and, so it was all completely true. (As if lies cannot be printed in book form.) It was kind of fascinating to hear the bizarre theories. At one point, the woman said that she had a group of Jewish customers, and in the months before the election, they didn’t seem concerned about who would win. She concluded that the Jews were all part of the conspiracy – they knew, well beforehand, that Obama was chosen to win the US presidency. (You know: all the millions of Jews in the world are in on this whole global conspiracy – they all have a front-row seat, and never tell any of their non-Jewish neighbors.) At one point, she remarked how evil these conspirators were (and, and since she thought the Jews played a major role in it, she must’ve been vilifying Jews in general). I couldn’t help but think that conspiracy theories end up confirming people’s pre-existing beliefs about the world. As muslims, they probably didn’t think very highly of Jews to begin with, now the whole conspiracy idea “confirms” their ideas that Jews are wicked and evil.

The man talked excitedly about how Obama’s mother was actually part of the ancient royal bloodline, that facebook and google were in on it to – these websites weren’t created by a couple guys (how absurd to think a couple guys could create these sites). Rather, they were obviously created by the government and used to track our personal relationships and figure out what information we were reading. According to him, capitalism and communism were always under the control of the global conspiracy. (Apparently, the whole cold war was just an elaborate stage play.) Underlying it all was the belief that Allah would punish these people in the end. I couldn’t help but notice that they were vilifying everything (the US government, capitalism, and communism) and, presumably, leaving Islam as the only true refuge against this global conspiracy. It was a rather ‘interesting’ set of ideas.

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As a side note regarding the whole bloodlines thing: every time there’s an election, it seems that someone makes some claim about how candidates or presidents are related to royal blood several centuries earlier. For example:

Bill Clinton was born William Jefferson Blythe, but took his stepfather’s name as a teenager. Clinton’s ancestry can be traced back, on his mother’s side, to King Henry III who ruled England from 1227 to 1272. He is descended from King Robert I of France.

I don’t know how true these claims are, but considering that people have more and more ancestors each generation backwards, I would think that everyone has royal blood somewhere in their ancestry. For example, I have two parents, four grandparents, eight great-grandparents, etc. The number of ancestors doubles every generation backwards (ignoring inbreeding, of course). This means I should have 16,777,216 ancestors if I go back 24 generations (and 24 generations is only 600 years, assuming 25 years per generation), plus another 16 million ancestors in the intervening 23 generations. This means I’m probably related to every Dutch person alive in the 1400s, and a decent portion of the Western European population at the same time. It’s pretty unremarkable to have royalty in your ancestry.

Oh wait, I get it now – we’re ALL in on the global conspiracy. I can’t believe I was a part of it this whole time! (Gosh, it’s like I’m suddenly in that scene in the Sixth Sense.)

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30 Greatest Conspiracy Theories

[Via Bad Astronomy] Phil Plait put up a post this morning linking to the Telegraph’s “History’s greatest conspiracy theories“. An interesting list, and I hadn’t heard of all of them. I did notice one that wasn’t on the list: the conspiracy that the polio vaccine given in Africa was spiked by the United States to sterilize Muslims:

The vaccine boycott – led last year by Islamic hard-liners who believed the vaccination campaign was a plot to sterilize or kill Muslims – is blamed for spreading the crippling disease back into more than a dozen African countries where it had previously been eradicated.

Ah well, I guess they can’t add all the world’s conspiracies.

One of the conspiracies that caught my eye:

25. The 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami – A popular theory in the Muslim world is that the tsunami could have been caused by an Indian nuclear experiment in which Israeli and American nuclear experts participated. Several newspapers in Egypt and the Middle East alleged that India, in its heated nuclear race with Pakistan, has acquired sophisticated nuclear technology from the US and Israel, both of which “showed readiness to co-operate with India in experiments to exterminate humankind,” beginning with the heavily populated Muslim regions of southeast Asia, where the bulk of casualties took place.

Funny how Israel and the United States figure into all of their conspiracy theories. It’s not enough that Israel and the US are “the enemy”, oh no. We *far* more evil than that. We are in a conspiracy to exterminate humankind (but only after we eat babies and kick all the puppies in the world).

This image from the 7/7 London bombings caught my eye. Apparently, some people interpret this image as showing that one of the bombers was actually photoshopped into the image. Note that his arm is behind the railing (how odd), and the railing goes into his face (I think that’s just a chance alignment). Even I had to do a double-take on the image.

Looking closely, I don’t think there’s much mystery, though. The dark area which appears to be behind the railing isn’t his arm. It’s a reflection of the dark building behind him, like the other reflections in the same image (in green). A series of pictures from the same security camera could reveal more about it.

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